Rob Nash’s Holy Cross Sucks!
(A Comedy about the Tragedy of School)
December 14-17, 2017

Presented by The VORTEX and Rob Nash
Written and Performed by Rob Nash
Directed by Jeff Calhoun
***These performances will be taped for TV and/or theatrical release***


      Rob Nash returns to The VORTEX to film his Off-Broadway hit, Holy Cross Sucks! for one week only December 14-17, 2018. Playwright/Performer, Rob Nash in conjunction with Tony Award Nominated Director, Jeff Calhoun present Holy Cross Sucks!, a comic journey through those unforgettable years of high school, starring Rob Nash as an ensemble cast that includes “the punk”, “the homo”, “the fat kid”, “the virgin”, “the nerd” and “the slut.”  Welcome back to the 80’s version of those formative years that traumatized us all! 

      In the spirit of teen film classics like Sixteen Candles, The Breakfast Club, and Fast Times At Ridgemont High, Holy Cross Sucks! follows three best friends as they navigate those painful, life-defining, and humiliating years of high school. We're never as vulnerable and as vicious, as beautiful and as ugly, as idealistic and apathetic, and as vain and as humble as when we're adolescents. Playing a full cast of beloved and reviled characters, Nash explores these paradoxes with biting humor, insight, and a killer soundtrack.


      • $35 Priority Seating , $25 General Admission , $15 Discount/Child/Artist/Student/Senior
      • Radical Rush Free Tickets: Limited free tickets for each performance in the spirit of sustainability, accessibility, and the gift economy. Radical Rush tickets released at 7pm each night-in-person only.
      • 2-for-1 admission Thursday and Sunday with donation of 2 cans for SafePlace
      • Advanced Reservations Recommended.  Limited seating.


      ROB NASH has performed internationally at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival and the Montreal Comedy Festival. Nash’s work has been produced at regional theaters including Stages in Houston, Tampa Bay Performing Arts Center, Carolina Theater in Durham, The VORTEX in Austin, The Cable Car in San Francisco, and Velvet Elvis Arts Lounge in Seattle.

      JEFF CALHOUN (Director) Disney's Newsies (Tony Award Nomination for Best Director), Bonnie & Clyde, Jekyll & Hyde, Grey Gardens, Deaf West's Big River (Tony Award Nomination for Best Revival of a Musical), Brooklyn, Annie Get Your Gun, Grease (Tony Award Nomination for Best Choreography), Tommy Tune Tonite, and The Will Rogers Follies. On tour and internationally, Jeff directed Dolly Parton's 9 to 5 and Disney's High School Musicals 1 & 2. Jeff is an associate artist at the Fords Theater. He loves to hear your thoughts on Twitter at @thejeffcalhoun.

        Funded and supported in part by VORTEX Repertory Company, a grant from the Texas Commission on the Arts, and by the Cultural Arts Division of the City of Austin Economic Development Department.